An unfortunate circumstance of moving so often was that I became jaded about God, Christianity and the Church. It took a while for me to find my passion for God. In that journey, I was able to observe the church from a unique perspective. As a layperson (regular churchgoer) who had served as a pastor. I began to think about church and service in a totally different way. While I was learning, my heart began to yearn for those who have left the church and not returned.
This is where I need your help. Where are you in your spiritual journey? Are you serving God? Are you even attending church? I am not writing a book: I am simply curious about where you are in the journey. 2015 is going to be a year of transition in my life...email me about your journey. Send it to revrod88@gmail.com. Thank you!
Rodney -
ReplyDeleteI once professed Christianity and have since renounced it back to being an agnostic. I thought I was being called to God and to serve him. Between three churches, I served in AWANA. Well, I will temper my language and what I am truly thinking about it. To keep it short, I got screwed over by all three churches, their leaders and the followers. They ran me out on a rail for various (usually cooked-up) reasons. God just sat back eating his popcorn watching the whole show and did NOTHING to help me. Now, I have sat in a church recently and heard a message of how everything is done to God's greater glory. Well, apparently, he wanted me out of his church and not serving him. He could have done something to stop it or prevent the hypocritical a-holes in those churches from running me out. Since he didn't, the message is pretty clear to me. I no longer trust him or his churches. When I used to go to a church, I expected better of them than what I can expect at work for example. I can expect a co-worker to backstab or do me wrong. At a church, I would have expected better of those who profess to follow God. And God lets this go on even to one who was under the delusion that he was being called upon to serve God and follow him. Well, fool me once - shame on God. Fool me twice - shame on me for being an idiot for trying again. Fool me a third time - I get your message loud and clear, God. I won't be back.
Yes, I have heard from many, including my own wife, that those are just people and they are flawed. My problem is not with them (except for being the aforementioned hypocritical a-holes that they are). My issue is that God just sat back and did NOTHING. If he is supposedly so powerful, he sure did nothing to demonstrate it. And I will not be fooled again.
On an added note, I see evil winning in this world over and over (Obama's tyrannical rule is just a small example of this). Again, I don't see God doing anything to help his followers.
Hi, Rodney! This subject is near and dear to my heart, and I am so glad that you wanted to blog about it. I left the Lord & the church in 1969 and did not return until 1994. Twenty five years without Him . . . & them! I've been back 20 years now and would not trade for the covering I have now as opposed to where I was back then. Did I have a good life then? Yes. It wasn't in the good times that I missed the Lord or the church; it was in those pitiful, bottomless black holes that life has a habit of handing us.
ReplyDeleteThe church has disappointed me many times. No, not THE Church but some of the inhabitants and leaders of the earth church, but I would not, could not, will not go back to where I was. I may flounder here & there, may get disappointed here & there, but I will never be without my Lord & Savior, and with that is the Body, the church. The pitiful thing is that I often let a very few rob me of the joy of the companionship and fellowship of the majority of the flock.
You know I grew up in the church, have a rich heritage in the Church of God. Because of the work I did with MACU, I got to work with other flavors: AOG, COGIC, CON, and guess what? Each one is the earth church and bless their hearts, they do as well as they can. I have learned, however, that if someone is trying to rob me of my joy, of my delight in the Lord, I change friends, change fellowships, whatever it takes to remain a servant in the Kingdom.
Again, thanks for the blog. You know how to find me if you need me. Deanne
I have served in over 5 churches in my lifetime, several in a volunteer position and 4 as a paid staff. I have worked in all ages, currently I am pastoring. I’ve been in paid ministry for over 28 years. There have been good times and bad times.
ReplyDeleteN these 28 years, I remember once, standing in the shower praying for God’s return just so some people would have to face the judgment of God. I’ve been accused of having an affair with a woman old enough to be my grandmother. I’ve been charged with embezzlement by another “pastor” and more. About ten months after leaving one church I developed panic attacks. I have often thought about what else I would do and the thought of going back to school to learn another trade doesn’t interest me, not does becoming a greeter at WalMart.
As far as “church” I believe too often we are attempt to play God and judge people for their actions. Also, too often we think we are being “Christians” and not what Jesus called us to be. A few years ago, I quit being a “Christian” because of what other “Christians” were like and I didn’t want to be one of them. I did not become an agnostic or leave the church, I decided to become what Jesus calls us to be and that is a “disciple.” The term “Christian” is not used in a positive sense when you read scripture, and being a disciple calls us to action not conduct. Jesus said, “By this all men will know you are my disciples if you love one another.”
Are we guilty of comparing ourselves to others? Are we judging ourselves by their standards our God’s?
Kevin
(Continued) For many of us we have our own definition of what love is, unfortunately, that involves being selfish.
ReplyDeleteHave we compartmentalized our lives? Do we have a separate love life from our spiritual life which is separate from our work life and social life? I do not believe we have compartments to our lives. Our spiritual life, love life, social life and work life is all combined.
The popular writer of the New Testament, Paul said, (Romans 12:1-2 - Message Bible) “So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.”
I remember the song “Fooling Yourself” by Styx which says:
You see the world through your cynical eyes
You’re a troubled young man I can tell
You’ve got it all in the palm of your hand
But you’re hand’s wet with sweat and your head needs a rest
And you’re fooling yourself if you don’t believe it
How can you be such an angry young man
When your future looks quite bright to me
How can there be such a sinister plan
That could hide such a lamb, such a caring young man
You’re fooling yourself if you don’t believe it
You’re kidding yourself if you don’t believe it
Get up, get back on your feet
You’re the one they can’t and you know it
Come on, let’s see what you’ve got
Just take your best shot and don’t blow it.
When I was in college, one professor/friend said in class, “Ministry is hard and painful, but it is worth it.”
If I could do it all over, I would. I would make some changes in me and set some boundaries so others don’t try to set them for me. Would I still get hurt? Yes. Because I’ve stuck with it, I look back and see how many times God has carried me, I see this weird indention in the sand and God said, that is where I dropped you on your butt so you would wake up and trust me, then he said, get up off your butt and lets do it my way.
Jesus also said, "Those who endure to the end, shall be saved." God has proven to me, even when he seems absent, he is not. Even when others are LESS than Godly, He will be. It is not about them, it is about Him and me.
Kevin